Non-practice

At times, I do have self-sabotage.

I think, to some degree, pretty much everyone does this, you can’t live a human life without experiencing it.

I don’t think there’s a huge problem with me, but, at times, I do set myself for failure.

That’s why it’s good to watch sports and get involved in competitive activities – it makes you want to win, it enhances your motivation.

Is there a solution?

The first step is acknowledging the issue.

The second?

Putting things into balance – yes, at times you’ll do self-sabotage, but it’s part of a paradox of life – you need both courage and fear, you need to take precautions and take risks, you need to be bold and to retreat, at the same time.

You need the full complexity of emotions in life, and self-sabotage can actually be healthy to some degree.

Just try and find the good measure, with this also.

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I know more than a person who thinks that by talking to people you make them feel good.

There are quite a few persons who think that.

I think that, on average, people prefer to be noticed and appreciate being talked to, but there are exceptions.

Some people prefer a quiet atmosphere.

And, as hard as this might be to be accepted, some people might be annoyed by other people.

What’s the solution?

Do consider that most people prefer a conversation, but stay alert for signs that a person would prefer the conversation not to continue or even having started.

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I think I have a poor memory, I tend to forget things.

Sometimes, my life is like a movie: Memento (2000), I need notes and procedures to know what to do.

And that’s the thing – having a poor memory forces me to think a lot.

„OK, I don’t know where this object usually goes – but where would it go?”.

It’s far more tiresome to always think – „What’s the purpose of this object – than to know it, as far as I can tell.

But, all in all, there is a solution – associations (X is related to Y, which is related to Z) and procedures (X should be done like this, following this procedure, rinse and repeat).

Did I mention how great Google Calendar is?

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There’s a song which says:

„… Mă consum pân-o să mă fac scrum” (Alina Eremia – Cum se face – YouTube)

(adapted translation) „… I stress myself so much, that I’ll turn into ashes. I’m burning!”

Should you do it? Should you allow yourself to be so immersed into the living, that you feel you’re burning?

It depends. On one hand, stressing yourself too much might not bring you good results. You might lose some health aspects, you might live less, you might have an unpleasant life.

On another hand, if you’re into the flow, if you’re enjoying what you do daily, you might do some great things.

So, it’s unclear. I’d say it like this – if „burning” helps you do good work, and it doesn’t affect your health (physical and mental), do it.

If you get too stressed, do stress over this, too – how to stop being so stressed?

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Sometimes, I get offended.

But, whenever I write something on this blog I try to speak about things that happen, as far as I can tell, to more than a single person.

So, if X does something that gets me upset, I’ll generally avoid writing about that thing.

But, if there is a generally bad thing (a company doing poor things to lots of people; a bad thing in the society), I will consider writing about this.

Why the difference?

• If I’m the one being offended, I am allowed to forgive that bad thing. It’s OK.
• If there is more than one party offended, it’s just for me to take action.

„Ai dreptul să ierți numai ce s-a făcut în paguba ta.” (Nicolae Iorga)
(via Nicolae Steinhardt »)

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I have vivid memories from the first part of my life when certain persons of authority (mostly, teachers), wanted to show that they had power.

And they did, they did have power.

But, at what cost?

What did it cost to put this power into practice?

People had not only power but also exercised this power aggressively. It felt like thorns.

I do have positive memories, moments of happiness, times of enjoyment.

But there were also times when people in power abused their power.

How did I use to look at their shadows?

As if it were huge, with immense power.

Because some pain of the thorns was real, even if the power was fictive.

The solution? Do some therapy, try to view the past as not-so-bad, associate good things with it, calm your emotions.

But some remains of the thorns are still there.

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In an interview (BANII TE FAC SĂRAC!), Robert Kiyosaki said:

«I don’t think about petty things. People think about petty things» – Robert Kiyosaki

This is so great!

It’s so irrelevant to think about the small things and to ignore the big stuff in life.

Sure, „big things” can mean different things to different people.

But focusing on the „small aspects”, talking about trivial things, might stop you from doing greater things.

Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg are told to have a limited wardrobe, not focusing so much on the small decision.

Barack Obama used to choose between just two options when picking a wardrobe, as a President.

Sure, it matters to look fine. But it matters even more to keep the focus where it’s important.

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