Language: English

I recently listened to a podcast by Horia-Roman Patapievici who said that he used to spend his holidays in the countryside.

That person said something similar to: “as a child, I used to spend all of my vacations in the countryside”. (“la țară”, “țăran de vacanță”)

I used to do so myself – I’ve spent a lot of my vacations at my grandparents, and quite some time with things like gardens, animals, woods, things like that.

But from time to time I used to meet some people who spent their time in the countryside – there were deep differences between us.

While education and opportunities gave me some advantages in some fields, there were some others that I lacked – the ability to do the hard work, resilience, strength, agility.

The differences were on the personal level, also. I can’t quite put my finger on this, but people had a different way of looking at life, at integrating within the community, on choosing the right path, on living spirituality.

Citește mai departeGrowing by the countryside

“Write like you talk” (approximate quote by Seth Goding):

I write like I talk. And nobody I know gets talkers block. Nobody.
No one wakes up and goes… unable to speak.
So if you write like you talk, don’t worry. Because you haven’t run out of things to say yet, so you won’t run out of things to blog.

The thing is, when I talk, daily, I say silly things.

Sometimes, I get an idea I want to share with the world.

But, day-to-day, I say silly things which are not worth sharing.

“Today, I went for a walk, did some exercise, I’m eating healthy, the weather was rather poor, and I’m thinking of starting an online course”.

I could say a thing like this to a friend, but if I blog daily writing like this, this won’t be an idea.

I used to do reviews of pretty much every movie I saw. After a while, I decided it’s not so good, and now I focus on writing about things that really shine.

Sure, I watch some movies, read some books, etc., but if I write about everything most of the blog posts will be really lame.

Instead, I prefer to write a bit rarer, and only mention the very best movies and books.

Sure, if I write as I talk, I will never run out of ideas, and I’ll also practice more.

But, sometimes, it’s best to hold your thoughts for yourself, and only publish some top articles.

Citește mai departeOn writing like you talk

“Opportunities multiply as they are seized.” ― Sun Tzu

I meet with different people in day-to-day life. (Recently, mostly online, of course.)

What strikes me is the different way in which people use their given talents.

I know people with great intellectual abilities who produce little, and people who struggle to make a good judgment, who, somehow, manage to make good decisions and do well in life.

Some decisions are simple – eat well, do some physical activity, sleep well and all-in-all lead a healthy life.

Others are a bit more complicated – build a career.

Yet, I’m always surprised by human nature – why do people choose between party A vs. B, why do people think that solution X is good, why do people fail to follow their dreams.

Citește mai departeOpportunities multiply as they are seized – Sun Tzu

Sometimes, I have my anxieties – moments in which  I’m afraid, I worry, I put the negative things in front of me.

One solution is to learn to cope with these – try to find out what causes fear, and what alternative ways I have in handling a state.

But there’s also another one, which is generally poorly regarded – avoiding the stressful event.

About this second solution – if the reason for fearing the things is not motivated (let’s say I’m afraid of planes, dogs, public speaking), yes, it’s a good thing to face the fear. You shouldn’t be afraid of planes, dogs, or public speaking.

But if you fear things which should, really, be feared, in my opinion, it’s good to avoid those items. I’m not afraid of dogs, but I am afraid of stray dogs. I’m not afraid of public speaking, but I am afraid of a hostile crowd. I’m not afraid of communicating, but I’m afraid of having arguments online.

All of these are examples of motivated fears.

The solution? Stay away from stray dogs, hostile crowds, and arguing online, as much as possible. Not possible? Face the fear and learn how to cope with this, but this should be plan B, in my opinion.

Citește mai departeNot looking for reasons to get upset

I watched some ads while living in the UK.

They were not pleasant to watch, but, still, they were rather nice.

I watch almost every year some ads from the Super Bowl.

I don’t like them too much, but, again, they’re not that bad, either.

And here comes the ads from the televisions in Romania.

There are some things on the TV which are worth watching – news, some TV shows.

But the ads that interrupt them make viewing almost impossible.

It’s hard for me to imagine how can I watch a movie on the TV.

The movie can be good, but watching the movie interrupted by ads makes it a poor experience.

And some ads are really aggressive and are around products that are sensitive.

This happens everywhere, but in Romania it’s a bit too much for my taste.

Citește mai departeTV Ads

In a lot of modern movies, things happen quickly. Frames go quickly, scene cuts happen a lot.

Viewer’s brain, your brain, my brain, have to go through a lot of information, in a small amount of time.

“Quick! Look here! Now, here! Faster! Faster!”.

Sometimes, this can tire the brain.

There is a rush of information in modern times.

Lots of notifications, news go fast, someone expects an answer.

What’s to do? Focus on finding solutions to calm the mind.

Citește mai departeScene cuts

At times, I do have self-sabotage.

I think, to some degree, pretty much everyone does this, you can’t live a human life without experiencing it.

I don’t think there’s a huge problem with me, but, at times, I do set myself for failure.

That’s why it’s good to watch sports and get involved in competitive activities – it makes you want to win, it enhances your motivation.

Is there a solution?

The first step is acknowledging the issue.

The second?

Putting things into balance – yes, at times you’ll do self-sabotage, but it’s part of a paradox of life – you need both courage and fear, you need to take precautions and take risks, you need to be bold and to retreat, at the same time.

You need the full complexity of emotions in life, and self-sabotage can actually be healthy to some degree.

Just try and find the good measure, with this also.

Citește mai departeSelf-sabotage

I know more than a person who thinks that by talking to people you make them feel good.

There are quite a few persons who think that.

I think that, on average, people prefer to be noticed and appreciate being talked to, but there are exceptions.

Some people prefer a quiet atmosphere.

And, as hard as this might be to be accepted, some people might be annoyed by other people.

What’s the solution?

Do consider that most people prefer a conversation, but stay alert for signs that a person would prefer the conversation not to continue or even having started.

Citește mai departeThanking by talking