Non-practice

When helping others, there are two types of situations:

• Helping some get out of trouble (generally, this can be resolved by financial means, but not all the time);
• Helping some get better.

There’s a lot of focus on the first part and little on the second part.

If someone has lots of success in life but needs some money to do even better, it’s a natural tendency to try to drag them down. „Oh, but he/she will be better than I! That’s not cool!”.

Also, when helping someone poor, there’s always a little thought about the laziness involved. „Have they worked hard to get out of their situation? Should I help this lazy person? Wouldn’t it have been better had they suffered?”

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See part 1: Free invites – Blog de Olivian Breda.

I go to a lot of events using free invites.

But, in my case, „free” generally involves giving something back, so it’s generally more like a barter.

I also invite some people as a token of goodwill.

But I don’t invite people expecting something in return.

Negative example #1: I used to organize a series of events. For a long time, we had a central, well-organized, cool, good-equipped, and friendly location. After a few years, the area closed. We had to charge a small tax (around 30 lei, something like that, less than €10; I think it was €6-7). Years after the event ended, I met someone who asked me, „At some point, did you hold the event for free?”. I was stunned. After all these years, all that person cared about the event was €7. We made no profit; we barely even covered our costs, even though we also had some sponsors.

Negative example #2: I invited one person to an event and asked that person to write a follow-up message on my blog beforehand. The person recorded the event (I’m not sure if they had permission for that) and told me at the end, „Here’s the video; write whatever you write.” When I told them they should write the article, they didn’t do it.

Negative example #3: I invited a person to an event and asked for a follow-up message. They asked for permission to write negative things, which I accepted. They wrote some things about event organization and logistics. While not of zero value, it had little value to other readers.

Writing a follow-up article helps me remember the information better, creates quality content for my blog, and allows me to network. It’s a win-win-win. Yet, few people write event follow-ups.

I know some event organizers who don’t give free event invitations. I like their policy.

People pay a premium for business class because of a certain kind of company. I like their view.

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It’s nice to turn off the lights when you leave the room. It might help the planet.

Of course, there are some instances when it’s more efficient to just leave them on.

On the other hand, we should focus on the important things.

Yes, turn off the lights, and keep doing this habit.

But also look for opportunities to do more at a much larger scale.

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I remember one article in which a person (a priest, as I remember) was telling about an ex-convict: the first thing that the person did once he got home from jail was to set free the dog at home from his chain.

There’s a short story in which a wolf initially admires the life of a dog, only to discover that the dog is chained during the day. At that point, the wolf says he prefers freedom to a free lunch.

I’m not sure what’s better for a dog in the modern world – to live in freedom, but likely with hardships, or to be a pet (likely with restrictions in movement).

I think animals suffer in captivity, so I opt not to have a pet.

A quote I like from Baltagul – Mihail Sadoveanu:

„Într-o clipă fu și ea în prag, țipând:
— Gheorghiță! Dă drumul cânelui!”

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I like change; it motivates me.

I don’t like change; it annoys me, it gets me out of my comfort zone, and I can make mistakes.

These are both assertions that are true at the same time.

I try to get over them, sometimes I succeed, at times I don’t.

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Where do you draw the line between hypocrisy and too harsh truths?

Sometimes, you need to lie and be a hypocrite.

At times, you need to tell a harsh truth.

Al doilea: precizarea inamicului cu care lupți. În armată se știe că este turcul, rusul sau altcineva, dar în lumea duhovnicească inamicul este diavolul. Nu luptăm cum zice Sfântul Apostol Pavel, cu trupul și cu sângele, ci cu puterile întunericului. Aici, de fapt, se face o greșeală foarte mare, că oamenii luptă cu oameni și se bucură diavolul, deci din gălăgia aceasta nejustificată câștigă al treilea. Pentru că toată lumea nu prețuiește pacea, care este de patru ori mai de preț decât dreptatea, ci ține la dreptate. Vedeți, aceasta este determinarea precisă a inamicului. (Părintele Arsenie Papacioc despre minunea rugăciunii | Doxologia)

You can’t start saying truths and expect to fix everything.

On the other hand, you can’t always conceal the truth.

Life is a paradox.

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„Unlimited wants is an economic term that refers to humans’ insatiable appetite for things. We never get enough because there is always something else that we need or want. The term ‘unlimited wants’ is the side of human nature that wants an infinite number of things. However, the resources we have available to get these wants are limited.” (Source: What are unlimited wants? Definition and examples – Market Business News)

People ask things of me. Sometimes, I satisfy their requests, at other times – no.

The wants are always unlimited, while the resources are not.

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It is hard to understand why you would call people to an event more than 15 minutes before the start.

The event should start on time.

In my opinion, it is not ok to call people at 9:30 and start at 10:15.

Another thing – ending a call prematurely and waiting for people who are late.

Let’s say you wait for someone who is late. You should extend an activity so that if someone else comes late, there is more time for the others in the end.

It’s not OK to wait for someone 10 minutes, then end everything abruptly due to lack of time.

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