The most powerful question to ask for self-development: „So, it’s his fault?” (via Nigel Risner)

More than 10 years ago, in October 18, 2007, at the Howard Johnson Hotel in Bucharest, HR Club organized a conference at which I’ve first seen Nigel Risner. His talk was about “How to Create IMPACT as an HR Partner”.

At some point, he asked for volunteers to a task which anyone should have volunteered to (be in front of people, be applauded). He picked the fastest person to raise his hand, and then asked a curious question to a participant – „Why didn’t you raise your hand?”. And the answer came „He was faster than me.”, to which Nigel Replied „So, it’s his fault?”

The thing is, a lot of people defend their actions by externalizing reasons.

  • „I don’t run, because it’s wet outside” vs. „It’s my choice and responsibility for choosing not to run today”.
  • „I was told I’m not good with this” vs. „I tend to look into the past, as opposed to present and future”.
  • „But I already told him that” vs. „I should have insisted more, and also check if the message was well understood”.

We tend to do this a lot – blaming external factors. It’s a very powerful thing to be accountable.

Thank you, Nigel!

One Day Closer – Guilty,

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