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Note: The article below has been written more than 2 years ago!

Advising advice for advisors

I have advising advice for advisors – don’t give advice, that’s my advice, which I also advise you to advise others (about this advice, of course).

Joking, aside, that’s my tip: don’t give advice.

Sure, you can say things which help people notice – „Look, I notice you do so-and-so”. You can express how this impacts you „You doing so-and-so makes me feel so-and-so, and I generally need to take this action in order to …”. So, do tell people how they impact you and what a specific action makes you feel.

On another hand, saying „You should do this” is, in my opinion, a poor solution.

The main reason is that this makes the advice easy to reject.

If you tell me „You tend to …”, I can accept this or reject this. If you tell me „You should do …” / „Why don’t you …” / „I think you should …”, I will definitely have a tendency for rejecting this.

It’s not my idea („Oh, I need to do so and so”), but a foreign one („Oh, X told me …”). Thus, I’ll fight it.

Finn Frode - Stay safe - stay at home
Finn Frode – Stay safe – stay at home, https://flic.kr/p/2k2DG5E
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